For Those Who Have Loved and Lost. How a Dragonfly Healed Me.

Welcome. I apologize, this is a rather personal post but one I had to share.

My Dad died nearly a year ago on July 29th, 2011.

It’s hard to believe a year went by so fast. I suppose, however, I’ve been in a fog through most of it. It’s no easy thing losing a parent. A father.

For all I thought long and hard about what to write in this post, there aren’t enough words. At least not the ones that sum it all up. 'All of it' being a lifetime of memories with an amazing man. And let me tell you, I’m sitting here now, totally blank, not sure what to write. One thing I can say is that he loved and loved well. Certain people came into his life later and I know he poured his heart into getting to know them better, the best way he knew how. I know he would want them to be happy always.

So now I'm writing a blog post about him and it's terribly hard. Why? Well, it’s an unimaginable thing to try to write on a blog about your feelings when you feel so strongly. 

The past year has been one of new beginnings. I have to look at it that way... as new beginnings. Because that's what it is when your entire life changes in a single moment, for better or worse.

I still remember those final moments in the ICU last year. Me, mom and my sister, Debbie, were there every day for two weeks. Dad faught the worst type of Sepsis poisoning as a result of chemo and pulled through. He'd had less than a 10% chance of survival. But he pulled through.

We got one more wonderful day with him. We were given the chance to say how much we loved one another. It was a gift. 

Regrettably, lung cancer victims don't come off the breathing incubator well. So he faught a hell of a battle only to lose. But we were all holding hands when he passed.

Life changed after that.

It’s strange going from the being the daughter of a couple who has been together for forty years to being the daughter of a mom who is totally broken and alone. Or at least that’s how it seemed at first. But my entire family has pulled together and through love and a strong belief in God, we’re slowly mending.

At Dad’s funeral last year an interesting thing happened. The navy officers were performing Taps when a fleet of mammoth Dragonflies started to swarm around not only Dad’s coffin but all in attendance. They were nearly the size of hummingbirds! It was the most amazing experience I think anyone there had ever witnessed. They stayed and circled our group on that bright, sunny day, even as Uncle Don (In full Navy uniform) and Ted sang Danny Boy. And, strangely enough, they waited until the last words of the ceremony were spoken before they promptly flew off.

Since then, when a dragonfly buzzes past anyone who had attended Dad’s funeral, they feel that Dad’s spirit is visiting. It’s pretty amazing.

Even better? The Dragonfly was Dad’s favorite.

Was what happened at his funeral and all those little moments since coincidence? Or was it more? Has he been visiting?

I suppose we’ll never really know. But the idea has helped us heal.

I miss and love you Dad. I hope that you’re happy wherever you may be.

God bless.

The point of my story? If you have a loved one who has passed and you shared big and small moments, cherish them. May they never be far from your heart. Perhaps you have a story like mine? A reason that you know deep down inside that they're still there and in touch.

For those who have loved and lost, stay strong and never stop believing.

For Mom and Dad, their song (and where they honeymooned)... I Left My Heart In San Francisco...

I searched high and low for this video. If one is going to present the 'real' Tony Bennett, they best well do it correctly. And yes, I'm a fan of Judy Garland as well. Take a moment and play this. It'll transport you through time. This is some old school talent, folks. They just don't make it like this anymore. Does the heart good.